Week 7
Writing Topic: Rules for Writers Chapter 4
Paragraphs build the body of your paper they contain the information needed to support the thesis. Each paragraph needs to have a main point; this main point is found in the topic sentence. In business as well as college writing the topic sentences are used to clarify what you are trying to present, this is important for people who are scanning for information. In developing the main point the writer needs it to be clear and easy to find. As writers we organize our papers in different patterns. Our writing takes the form of narration: telling a story, description; sketching a image of a person, place or thing, process; structuring a paper in chronological order, comparison and contrast; detailing similarities and differences, analogy; drawing comparisons between items which appear to have little in common, cause and effect, definition and classification and division; grouping items into categories or dividing items into parts.
When writing paragraphs you want to link the ideas clearly and have the sentences flow from one to another. Your point of view needs to remain consistent and repeating key words is an important technique to refine. Transitions are used to make stronger connections between your paragraphs for the reader. Paragraph writing is an important skill to develop. As a writer you need to be aware of the length of your paragraphs, the reasons for combining paragraphs and the reasons for starting new ones.
In my own writing I always thought that each paragraph just needed to follow a point made in the thesis statement. Now after reading this chapter I realize that that is only one step in the process.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
"Shooting Dad" Dialogue
“Shooting Dad” Dialogue
I really liked this story. It shows how differences in a family, large or small, make for interesting telling. Sarah tells the story of how she was different than her twin sister and her dad. She took a stand against guns, something that shaped her fathers life. After years of disagreeing with her father about guns Sarah decides to try and understand her father and his love of guns. What she finds is that they are not so different after all. The thing that brought her to this realization was the cannon her father built. After two years, when it was finished, she decided to go home and be with her father when he shot it off. After the experience Sarah comes to the realization that, "Oh. My. God. My dad and I are the same person. We’re both smart-alecky loners with goofy projects and weird equipment.” Although she does not change her mind about guns, well maybe the cannon, Sarah has a new appreciation for her dad and the things he creates.
The significance of the title “Shooting Dad” comes at the end of the story when Sarah’s dad tells her that when he dies he wants his ashes shot out of the cannon on the opening day of hunting season. Sarah with her new found understanding agrees to do so.
I really liked this story. It shows how differences in a family, large or small, make for interesting telling. Sarah tells the story of how she was different than her twin sister and her dad. She took a stand against guns, something that shaped her fathers life. After years of disagreeing with her father about guns Sarah decides to try and understand her father and his love of guns. What she finds is that they are not so different after all. The thing that brought her to this realization was the cannon her father built. After two years, when it was finished, she decided to go home and be with her father when he shot it off. After the experience Sarah comes to the realization that, "Oh. My. God. My dad and I are the same person. We’re both smart-alecky loners with goofy projects and weird equipment.” Although she does not change her mind about guns, well maybe the cannon, Sarah has a new appreciation for her dad and the things he creates.
The significance of the title “Shooting Dad” comes at the end of the story when Sarah’s dad tells her that when he dies he wants his ashes shot out of the cannon on the opening day of hunting season. Sarah with her new found understanding agrees to do so.
Sunday, September 19, 2010
"Coming Home Again" Dialogue
“Coming Home Again” Dialogue
This is a heartfelt story written by a son about his mother. Although Chang-rae Lee’s mother wanted him to go away to boarding school so he could advance his education and experience new things, she missed him deeply. He was her first born and they had a special connection. When Chang-rae reached his teenage years he began, like so many teenagers, to out grow his family and their ways of doing things. His mother’s behavior, her almost submissive ways, began to irritate him and caused him to be angry with her. After going to boarding school Chang-rae missed his family and realized their importance in his life. His mother however, felt he was out growing her. Perhaps she felt he would think less of her. Their common ground was food, the things he watched her cook and would latter cook for her. These were traditional dishes that she cooked for each of his home comings.
As her illness took over the families lives Chang-rae’s mother began to wish she had not sent him away to boarding school. She said, “Yes. I made a big mistake. You should be with us for that time.” Chang-rae would have probably gone away at some point as he grew older but, when we realize our time is going to be cut short with someone we regret time not spent. I feel that is why his mother thought sending him to school was a mistake. For many of us who face losing a loved one to illness the time we didn’t take because, we thought we had plenty of it becomes so precious. For Chang-rae’s mother I think that loss of time with her son became a reality as her life was drawing to an end.
This is a heartfelt story written by a son about his mother. Although Chang-rae Lee’s mother wanted him to go away to boarding school so he could advance his education and experience new things, she missed him deeply. He was her first born and they had a special connection. When Chang-rae reached his teenage years he began, like so many teenagers, to out grow his family and their ways of doing things. His mother’s behavior, her almost submissive ways, began to irritate him and caused him to be angry with her. After going to boarding school Chang-rae missed his family and realized their importance in his life. His mother however, felt he was out growing her. Perhaps she felt he would think less of her. Their common ground was food, the things he watched her cook and would latter cook for her. These were traditional dishes that she cooked for each of his home comings.
As her illness took over the families lives Chang-rae’s mother began to wish she had not sent him away to boarding school. She said, “Yes. I made a big mistake. You should be with us for that time.” Chang-rae would have probably gone away at some point as he grew older but, when we realize our time is going to be cut short with someone we regret time not spent. I feel that is why his mother thought sending him to school was a mistake. For many of us who face losing a loved one to illness the time we didn’t take because, we thought we had plenty of it becomes so precious. For Chang-rae’s mother I think that loss of time with her son became a reality as her life was drawing to an end.
Rules for Writers Chapter 3 Summary
Week 6
Writing Topic: Rules for Writers chapter 3
Revising your essay involves looking at grammar and sentence structure as well as the focus, purpose and over all content of the paper. After reading your rough draft you may decide to restructure or completely delete paragraphs that hinder the focus of your thesis. Sometimes you will decide to change the thesis to fit the information you want to present. This is what revising is all about. During this process questions you may want to ask yourself include; is the focus of the paper clear, are the ideas presented in a logical clear manner, is the material relevant and persuasive and does the draft offer just one point of view?
When revising you need to edit your work carefully. Grammar checkers help but, you have to make decisions on grammatical structure. Proof reading is the final step, I proofread out loud like I am presenting to an audience. Just hearing a sentence or whole paragraph out loud can often help me realize what needs to be changed. I have also tried reading the paragraphs from the conclusion backward to see if they still make sense. I liked the example essay they used. It held helpful tips on how to revise an informational essay.
Looking at the structure of revising will help me when I write. Too often I worry about grammar and sentence structure when I am doing a rough draft. The lesson for me to learn is that a rough draft is meant to be just that. I need to remember to just use this time to get my thoughts down on paper and then revise.
Writing Topic: Rules for Writers chapter 3
Revising your essay involves looking at grammar and sentence structure as well as the focus, purpose and over all content of the paper. After reading your rough draft you may decide to restructure or completely delete paragraphs that hinder the focus of your thesis. Sometimes you will decide to change the thesis to fit the information you want to present. This is what revising is all about. During this process questions you may want to ask yourself include; is the focus of the paper clear, are the ideas presented in a logical clear manner, is the material relevant and persuasive and does the draft offer just one point of view?
When revising you need to edit your work carefully. Grammar checkers help but, you have to make decisions on grammatical structure. Proof reading is the final step, I proofread out loud like I am presenting to an audience. Just hearing a sentence or whole paragraph out loud can often help me realize what needs to be changed. I have also tried reading the paragraphs from the conclusion backward to see if they still make sense. I liked the example essay they used. It held helpful tips on how to revise an informational essay.
Looking at the structure of revising will help me when I write. Too often I worry about grammar and sentence structure when I am doing a rough draft. The lesson for me to learn is that a rough draft is meant to be just that. I need to remember to just use this time to get my thoughts down on paper and then revise.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Summary Rules for Writers Chapter 2
Rules for Writing: Chapter 2 Drafting
A rough draft is a time for ideas and organization. You will need to identify what the thesis of your paper is and include it in your introduction. Usually a thesis is composed in one sentence. The thesis may be easier to construct after you have formulated the main body of your paper. However, it is always important to remember that you need a hook to draw in your audience. Do not assume that they will be interested in the topic. This hook should be your thesis sentence. It is your job as the writer to catch and keep the audiences attention. An effective thesis needs supporting evidence. Collect sources to support the purpose you have identified, making sure you will have enough documentation or you may have to redefine your thesis. Using techniques, one example is blue printing, gives the writer organizational skills so that you are able to write in a way that lets the reader know where the paper is heading. There is a fine line between statements which are too vague or to factual. The body of the paper can be constructed around a preliminary outline which will help you to block out your paragraphs. It is possible during the rough draft that you may exclude some of the ideas you gathered in making your outline, some of your other ideas may stand out as vocal points just needing clarification. It is important to include material that will help your readers follow your train of thought. The conclusion to your paper can be short. It needs to reinforce your main points but, not restate them. It can also be used to give the reader additional information on the subject to consider.
As a writer the points made in the chapter remind me to stay in touch with the critical parts of a paper. The thesis is so important and the body of the paper needs to fill in the necessary information to support it. I need to remember to stick to the point I am trying to make and not add so much additional information that it gets lost in the print.
A rough draft is a time for ideas and organization. You will need to identify what the thesis of your paper is and include it in your introduction. Usually a thesis is composed in one sentence. The thesis may be easier to construct after you have formulated the main body of your paper. However, it is always important to remember that you need a hook to draw in your audience. Do not assume that they will be interested in the topic. This hook should be your thesis sentence. It is your job as the writer to catch and keep the audiences attention. An effective thesis needs supporting evidence. Collect sources to support the purpose you have identified, making sure you will have enough documentation or you may have to redefine your thesis. Using techniques, one example is blue printing, gives the writer organizational skills so that you are able to write in a way that lets the reader know where the paper is heading. There is a fine line between statements which are too vague or to factual. The body of the paper can be constructed around a preliminary outline which will help you to block out your paragraphs. It is possible during the rough draft that you may exclude some of the ideas you gathered in making your outline, some of your other ideas may stand out as vocal points just needing clarification. It is important to include material that will help your readers follow your train of thought. The conclusion to your paper can be short. It needs to reinforce your main points but, not restate them. It can also be used to give the reader additional information on the subject to consider.
As a writer the points made in the chapter remind me to stay in touch with the critical parts of a paper. The thesis is so important and the body of the paper needs to fill in the necessary information to support it. I need to remember to stick to the point I am trying to make and not add so much additional information that it gets lost in the print.
Monday, September 6, 2010
Essay 1 Rough Draft
Image Essay
Football is a national past time. It is portrayed in almost every medium. I would not consider myself a football fan and this is not a football story. I look at this picture of two of my grandsons, Austin who is eleven and Bailey who is nine and I see hope for the future. Yes they are good looking boys but, to see them on the football field together means so much more to me. When I look at this picture I see a second generation of a family brought back together by hope, faith and love. For me football is a story about family, friendship, hardship, grief and renewed hope. For you to understand what this picture means to me we will need to go back to the beginning.
I was born and raised in Napa, a military family of four girls, we did not watch football. In 1975 I took a vacation to see the Redwoods. While there I met my husband we were married later that year. At the time he had a five year old son, Dan, and I had a one year old son Morgan. Over the next four years my husband and I added two more sons to our family, James and Stephen. My husband was an avid Cowboys fan and the boys grew up exposed to sports of all types especially football. I was the mother of in a household of five males. I used the time they watched football with their father to pursue other interests. We lived in McKinleyville which is located in Humboldt County. McKinleyville was a small town; it was by passed by Highway 101 and was not considered a tourist stop. When I moved there there were only two traffic lights, no large stores or fast food chains where built until the mid 80’s. We lived on the main street of town and it was common to watch horses being ridden down the street as well as cars. Everyone knew each other. Children went to the same schools as their siblings and their friends advanced year to year with them. As a stay at home mom our home was often the stopping point after school for those boys who had working moms.
When my boys were teenagers three of them became part of the towns’ high school football team. Even before school resumed for the year practice started. Practice consumed many hours of the days leading up to school starting and continued to fill their afternoon hours. Our home revolved around their schedules, playbooks and strategy meetings. These practices cumulated into Friday night games, homecoming parades and numerous celebrations. It did not matter so much if they won or lost it was football a time of bonding. It was a time to give it your all, to come off the field covered with dirt and grime, and to learn rules that would continue to guide their lives forever. Friendships were formed that would last many years. To be on the team and wear the letterman jackets was a big thing in our small town. They were a group looked up to by other students. One for all and all for one during the fall of the year there was nothing better than being a part of the team.
It was during this time that my husband grew ill. He struggled for many years but, was able to attend many of their home games. As his health worsened it was not unusual for a group of boys to come home with my sons after games and fill him in on all the details. In 1998 my husband passed away. This was a hard time for us. My youngest son, Stephen was just eighteen and planning his wedding. His older brother Morgan, my middle son was expecting his first child. The family was crushed we did not know how to continue with our lives. My oldest son Dan pulled away from the family. He was angry and expressed that he never felt like part of our family, he felt as if he was an outsider. I had no idea he had these types of feelings, I had always felt like his mother in every way. Hurt and confused I let him slip away. Soon after he divorced his wife, left his family and remarried. Dan stopped communicating with us all, including his children from his first marriage. It was at this time that his son Bailey was born.
The family did not see much of Bailey or Dan. As families do in times of stress we grouped together and went on. Attempts to include Dan or even communicate with him were filled with confrontation and anger. Things were said that created big wholes in our family. Things which can be forgiven but, are much harder to forget. It was as if losing my husband, their father broke the link that joined us together as a family. Thinking there would be time for things to change attempts for a reconnection grew few and far between. Holidays and birthdays became cards we exchanged with Dan not celebrations we shared. Phone calls were rare and often strained, no one wanting to step on the others toes. In 2008 my son Dan ended his life. Words could not convey the way we felt as a family. The time we were sure we had plenty of ran out. Feelings ran high regret because we thought we had more time, guilt for not reaching out, sorrow because nothing could change the fact that he was gone. For me there was also the fact that I had promised his father that I would keep Dan close to his family. I had failed.
Slowly as a family we began to regroup. Kristen, Baileys mother wanted him to know his fathers family. There was hope a hand reached our even hesitantly is a chance for a new beginning. Slowly we began to communicate, not talking about the past but, all acknowledging our part in the past. Words can not be unsaid and what has happened in the past is done the lesson here was to move forward as a family. My son James encouraged his brother Stephen, who never played group sports after the age of ten to coach youth football last year. This year Austin is on James’s Arcata team and Bailey is on Stephen’s Eureka team. Dan and Stephen never had a chance to repair the damage done to their relationship as brothers by now Stephen has a real chance to build a relationship with Bailey his brothers’ son.
This picture of the boys at their football jamboree fills me with hope, pride and love. It reminds me of the growth of our family, through childhood, the loss of my husband and how it affected us all, the senseless death of my son and the rebuilding of our family. It is a testament that life can change at any second and to the fact that if we are lucky for every ending there is a new beginning. Here are two boys on different teams bonding over the sport of football. This picture brings a smile to my face and a tear to my eye. It reminds me that for any ending there is a beginning if we are lucky enough to find it. For a lot of children football helps them to learn to be part of a team. An important lesson because, life is much more fulfilling played is a team game.
Football is a national past time. It is portrayed in almost every medium. I would not consider myself a football fan and this is not a football story. I look at this picture of two of my grandsons, Austin who is eleven and Bailey who is nine and I see hope for the future. Yes they are good looking boys but, to see them on the football field together means so much more to me. When I look at this picture I see a second generation of a family brought back together by hope, faith and love. For me football is a story about family, friendship, hardship, grief and renewed hope. For you to understand what this picture means to me we will need to go back to the beginning.
I was born and raised in Napa, a military family of four girls, we did not watch football. In 1975 I took a vacation to see the Redwoods. While there I met my husband we were married later that year. At the time he had a five year old son, Dan, and I had a one year old son Morgan. Over the next four years my husband and I added two more sons to our family, James and Stephen. My husband was an avid Cowboys fan and the boys grew up exposed to sports of all types especially football. I was the mother of in a household of five males. I used the time they watched football with their father to pursue other interests. We lived in McKinleyville which is located in Humboldt County. McKinleyville was a small town; it was by passed by Highway 101 and was not considered a tourist stop. When I moved there there were only two traffic lights, no large stores or fast food chains where built until the mid 80’s. We lived on the main street of town and it was common to watch horses being ridden down the street as well as cars. Everyone knew each other. Children went to the same schools as their siblings and their friends advanced year to year with them. As a stay at home mom our home was often the stopping point after school for those boys who had working moms.
When my boys were teenagers three of them became part of the towns’ high school football team. Even before school resumed for the year practice started. Practice consumed many hours of the days leading up to school starting and continued to fill their afternoon hours. Our home revolved around their schedules, playbooks and strategy meetings. These practices cumulated into Friday night games, homecoming parades and numerous celebrations. It did not matter so much if they won or lost it was football a time of bonding. It was a time to give it your all, to come off the field covered with dirt and grime, and to learn rules that would continue to guide their lives forever. Friendships were formed that would last many years. To be on the team and wear the letterman jackets was a big thing in our small town. They were a group looked up to by other students. One for all and all for one during the fall of the year there was nothing better than being a part of the team.
It was during this time that my husband grew ill. He struggled for many years but, was able to attend many of their home games. As his health worsened it was not unusual for a group of boys to come home with my sons after games and fill him in on all the details. In 1998 my husband passed away. This was a hard time for us. My youngest son, Stephen was just eighteen and planning his wedding. His older brother Morgan, my middle son was expecting his first child. The family was crushed we did not know how to continue with our lives. My oldest son Dan pulled away from the family. He was angry and expressed that he never felt like part of our family, he felt as if he was an outsider. I had no idea he had these types of feelings, I had always felt like his mother in every way. Hurt and confused I let him slip away. Soon after he divorced his wife, left his family and remarried. Dan stopped communicating with us all, including his children from his first marriage. It was at this time that his son Bailey was born.
The family did not see much of Bailey or Dan. As families do in times of stress we grouped together and went on. Attempts to include Dan or even communicate with him were filled with confrontation and anger. Things were said that created big wholes in our family. Things which can be forgiven but, are much harder to forget. It was as if losing my husband, their father broke the link that joined us together as a family. Thinking there would be time for things to change attempts for a reconnection grew few and far between. Holidays and birthdays became cards we exchanged with Dan not celebrations we shared. Phone calls were rare and often strained, no one wanting to step on the others toes. In 2008 my son Dan ended his life. Words could not convey the way we felt as a family. The time we were sure we had plenty of ran out. Feelings ran high regret because we thought we had more time, guilt for not reaching out, sorrow because nothing could change the fact that he was gone. For me there was also the fact that I had promised his father that I would keep Dan close to his family. I had failed.
Slowly as a family we began to regroup. Kristen, Baileys mother wanted him to know his fathers family. There was hope a hand reached our even hesitantly is a chance for a new beginning. Slowly we began to communicate, not talking about the past but, all acknowledging our part in the past. Words can not be unsaid and what has happened in the past is done the lesson here was to move forward as a family. My son James encouraged his brother Stephen, who never played group sports after the age of ten to coach youth football last year. This year Austin is on James’s Arcata team and Bailey is on Stephen’s Eureka team. Dan and Stephen never had a chance to repair the damage done to their relationship as brothers by now Stephen has a real chance to build a relationship with Bailey his brothers’ son.
This picture of the boys at their football jamboree fills me with hope, pride and love. It reminds me of the growth of our family, through childhood, the loss of my husband and how it affected us all, the senseless death of my son and the rebuilding of our family. It is a testament that life can change at any second and to the fact that if we are lucky for every ending there is a new beginning. Here are two boys on different teams bonding over the sport of football. This picture brings a smile to my face and a tear to my eye. It reminds me that for any ending there is a beginning if we are lucky enough to find it. For a lot of children football helps them to learn to be part of a team. An important lesson because, life is much more fulfilling played is a team game.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)